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Kategori: Funderingar

Pandoras ask

När du börjar gräva i ditt inre för att förstå vad som håller dig tillbaka, då kommer det ibland att kännas som att du öppnar Pandoras ask. En massa gammal skit kommer välla upp. Det är helt naturligt. Skiten måste ut för att det ska bli rent och snygg. Först då går det också att…

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Sårbarhet en förutsättning för bra konst

Corona har gett mig tid till reflektion och jag känner mig nyfiken på att undersöka de saker som kommer upp. Jag har fortsatt att fundera på den nedärvda programmeringen att göra ”rätt” och hur det påverkat mig och mitt uttrycksbehov. I samma veva dyker minnen upp, tillfällen då rädslan triggats eller förvärrats. Min första stora…

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Att göra rätt

Jag är uppvuxen i en familj av perfektionister. Det kan låta hårt, men det finns en anledning till perfektionisttänket. Under första tiden av sitt äktenskap bodde min mormor under samma tak som sin svärmor. Morfars mor var en högt aktad kokerska i bygden. Hon arbetade hos de finaste familjerna och på de finaste kalasen. Inte…

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Am I Really That Unique?

I often feel like an alien these days. Maybe not like I’m from another planet, but at least from another dimension. I don’t know, but I seem to think and worry about things that not many others find worth brooding over. Is there something wrong with me? As a child I can’t say I felt…

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Dating Sites

Yes, et tu Brute. I have tried it. Twice. Do I have to say it? Okay. I hated it. Hated it! It’s like window shopping for a partner. Will this one go with my new jacket? Oh no, I can’t wear heels with this one. Married? Really. Well at least he was honest about it.…

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Be Yourself

How is that possible? I haven’t yet found out who I am. I’m still looking for my true self. On the other hand – how can people not be themselves? What a waste of energy. When I think about it I see so much fear and lies we have bought into, because what we actually…

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Do You Listen?

I’ve just had a conversation with artist and life coach Christine Lehtinen. The topic was of course me and my dreams. (Yes, again.) Some people might see me as a big talker, and I do talk, but I also enjoy listening. Christine is a fantastic listener, which made me realise how rare it is. Such…

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Happy New Year 2018

Finally 2017 is over. Good riddance! It was a crappy year in so many ways. Feels great to get a new year, a clean slate. Phew! Of course not much has changed, but there is a sense of freedom, peace and possible new beginnings. A second chance to get things right, or at least better. ”Oh…

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Looking For a Savior

Am I looking for a savior? Not Jesus or Buddha, but perhaps a (hu)man savior? Someone who could tell me what and who I am? Do I struggle with my identity? Do I wanna ”be” someone in the world? I think the answer to all these questions is – yes. I think others have said…

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A Giant Leap

We all know the quote. Even those who weren’t born yet. I was 2 weeks old at the time, when Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon: ”One small step for man. One giant leap for man-kind.” is what he said. Amazing. That’s exactly how I felt Friday, launching my brand new Facebook page. Amazing –…

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Just a Singing Clown

I love watching unknown, but great singers and performers audition in talent shows. I never watch the entire shows on TV, but clips online on YouTube. I especially like when the jury underestimate somebody because of their looks. Secretly I too would like to be able to surprise the world with my unique (singing) talents.…

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Moody Blues

My summer vacation in Kalix ended today and I’m on my way back to Berlin. It’s always difficult to leave my family behind. Another six months before we see each other again. If I’m lucky. Right now my life is very uncertain. I have no job, almost no money and it scares me. I’ve never…

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